don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
you never un-have a 4some
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
