Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
