what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
