Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Randomize
