I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
