this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
