Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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