Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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