guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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