Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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