did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
