you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Randomize
