if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
