Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
