is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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