It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
