I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
do nipples grow back?
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