So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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