i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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