I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
He shit in the fireplace
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize
