lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
