i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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