So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Randomize
