So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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