Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
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