She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
