You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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