Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Everyone says I win the strip club
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Randomize
