You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
