I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Randomize
