we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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