mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
She announced her abortion via fbk
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize