he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I cannot find my penis.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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