also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize
