Apparently you make a good broom.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
