I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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