am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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