Having a random hookup so left but love u
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
