awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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