Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
