Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
