Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
