It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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