im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
