I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
