We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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