You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
