dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
All the doctor said was why
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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