I want to stick my p in your. b.
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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