From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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